this post may disappear by tiny successive scissors

Thank you for the emails and comments about the poem up this week at Linebreak.org. I was jazzed to learn it was live.

This one more any in the book "grew up" online - from an 8-line earliest blog draft, to a round of backchannel email workshopping, to the editor rejecting the submitted draft, asking for a new, and accepting the final revision. And finally, I meet Lori Lamothe for the first time enjoying her recording of the piece. I appreciate everyone for helping me shape this one. I'm happy to see it step out on its own.

It is the last elegy I plan to write. It was one of the final additions to the book in late 2007. OK, I know there will be more brother poems, but this one finally explained to me what for so many years remained senseless - how does a healthy 17-year-old suddenly get diagnosed with Acute Lymphatic Leukemia? Only recently did my mom tell me a story she had been carrying with her since 1989. A month before diagnosis, my brother had been working in a factory and accidentally siphoned a mouthful of Freon trying to unclog a line (though writing this - HA! - I finally realize that was more likely his cover story for huffing). Before he could react to spit, he felt the entire backwash evaporate into his sinuses. No way to be sure that this was the "blood mutating" moment which derailed his health, but for me it's a final piece in a puzzle our family had been huddling over since his death.

Thank you Mark. I continue to learn to know you closer.